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Denmark
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It will cost you - pay up first. Only interested in science-fiction roles, and Star Wars affiliated projects (villain) - the rest of you can F off and go F yourselves - unless you as a director or producer have a very solid argument on - why i should waste my time on your shitty movie and your tyrant childish behavior on set - BE AWARE - i might kick your pinchy effing ass if you piss me off with your BS on set. Also - i am a multilinguist, hence i can swear you into pieces by multiple scary ways, if i get irritated by your stupid grandiose last minute ideas, that will ruin more - your already shitty script - i am a nightmare to work with and a hobby psychopath - and a psychic - i can always predict your directoral assholeness before you can even utter - "ACTION!!!" Sometimes i will abruptly abandon the set for no apparent reason - other than that, i am generally super annoying, and don´t give a F about you, the film crew, the budget, or the deadline. Probably in a rage infused drunken walk - get into a fistfight with some innocent bewildered police officers, or homeless people, maybe even stray dogs with rabies - just because i am an asshole into Yoga - i will most likely also trash most of your equipment if i will ever return to your stinky set again. Contact me if you are connected to George Lucas Entertainment or other sci-fi related hiring - in which case - i will become a complete sell out and behave as a likeable person, act as i am ordered, while pretending to be an actor... I will make Moff Gideon look like a lonely used up soap block in a prison shower... When said and almost done - these are my positive traits: I am very paranoid - a reptilian shapeshifter - unpredictable - hate venusians - don´t like pizza - have sour feet and smelly eyes - sleep all day and very lazy - repulsive manners - never changes underwear and won´t brush my teeth - like to do love scenes with beautiful women, and many other positive traits that will make you want to hire me on the spot without auditioning...
